Saturday, September 22, 2007

I am a Stalker

Shocked aren't you? No? That's disappointing. I was hoping this revelation might have enough shock value to suddenly elevate me out from the depths of obscurity and usher me into the adulatory life of ‘Celebrity’dom. So much for hopes and dreaming big! Well, there still are thoughts to think and posts to fill, so I will just drown my disappointment in a couple of thimbles of water and get on with it.

Yes, I am a stalker. A discussion-forum stalker. I am not sure when I turned into one but my best guess is that it happened right after I figured out that there were discussion forums littered all over the net. It must have been a long time since my transition happened, from a regular guy to stalker guy, because now when I think about it, it feels as if I have been this way forever!

I know why I stalk.

Broadly classified, there are discussion forums of two types that I have come across (It's very probable that this is all the variety available as far as forums are concerned!). One is where the people involved in the discussions come across as informed, well-read and polite people who can discuss/argue something from so many view points that my head hurts just reading and assimilating all of it. And these guys also show the presence of a healthy sense of humor. The other is where the people involved come across as retarded juveniles (I think I am seriously undermining the credibility of retarded juveniles by making this comparison).

Usually people think I am smart when they look at me, but when I start speaking, they think otherwise. Like the joke goes, I'm just proof of the fact that light travels faster than sound. Because of this unique gift of mine, I keep away from active participation in discussion forums falling under either of the above mentioned categories. In the first group, I will probably end up providing comic relief and in the second, I will probably have too many of my kind to deal with. To avoid either of these situations, I turned stalker.

I just keep tracking a particular discussion to see who says what and where it all leads to. There is a definite benefit to be had out of this. If I can make my presence known on the discussion board without contributing anything to the discussion, then people will know someone is just standing aside and watching what they are doing. And there is bound to be someone who will think, "This guy has been here but he hasn't said anything so far. Why is he not saying anything? May be he is not interested? But he is here isn't he? What is he doing here? May be I said something wrong and he is just laughing his head off?" After a few more exchanges in the discussion, "Damn! He still hasn't said anything. I am sure he is laughing at me. What did I say? Why is he laughing?" You see where I am going with this?! I don't say anything but still, what I think matters!!

The guy who said "Silence is Golden" was probably someone like me! :)

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